The Moment Forgiveness Transformed Trauma Into Strength - Dharasena

Surviving sexual assault. Grieving a murdered brother. Choosing forgiveness anyway.

Dharasena’s story is raw, courageous, and deeply redemptive. After enduring sexual assault and losing her brother to murder, she faced disbelief when she reported the crime. While pursuing justice for her family, she quietly battled PTSD and addiction.

In this moving episode, Dharasena shares how faith and forgiveness became the breakthrough that shifted her from anger and survival mode to true healing. If you’re navigating trauma recovery, grief, betrayal, or injustice, this conversation will speak to your heart and remind you that healing is possible and that your story is not over.

 Connect with Dharasena:

Email:  journey2overcome@gmail.com
Dharasena would love to pray with you or pray for you. 

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Book: Why I Survived; Where Survival Becomes Strength

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:07

Imagine when you share your darkest hours, they become someone else's light. I'm Jennifer Lee, a global community storyteller, host, author, and survivor, guiding you through genuine unfiltered conversations. Together, we break the silence, shatter stigma, and amplify voices that need to be heard. Each episode stands as a testament to survival, healing, and reclaiming your power. Listen to I Need Blue on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, or your favorite platform. Learn more at www.inedblue.net. Trigger warning: I Need Blue shares real life stories of trauma, violence, and abuse meant to empower and support. Please take care of yourself and ask for help if needed. Now let's begin with today's story. Darethina wants to share her journey to overcome. She was sexually assaulted while on the job by an authoritative figure. She reported it to her supervisors and was met with retaliation from everyone. She ended up getting fired from her career field. A few years later, she was riveted by the news of her brother's murder. She tried to deal with the turmoil independently and sought opioids to help numb the pain. She wanted to end her life, and God spoke to her, encouraging her to get help by checking into a hospital. Two years ago, she was able to get off the mood stabilizers. This year, she celebrates four years clean from her dependency on opioids. God led Darusina to speak about the importance of forgiveness and how her healing journey didn't begin until she was able to forgive the person who sexually assaulted her and forgive the two individuals who killed her brother. Darusina, your story is impactful. There is strength and courage behind your words. A mutual friend connected us, as you were encouraged to share your story, letting others know you are not alone. God has called you to do great things, one of which is to share your journey.

SPEAKER_00 3:07

Thank you so much for having me. It's truly an honor to be here. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 3:11

Of course. You courageously shared your story with me. Today, I'm happy to provide you the opportunity to share many of your messages, including how to let go and let God. Can you share with us what occurred that day?

Sexual assualt

SPEAKER_00 3:30

Sure. Um, I truly appreciate your story, and I'm sorry that that happened to you. When I was in my situation, we were actually at a party, and the supervisors were there, some of my authoritative figures were there, and as well as other employees, drinking was involved in the situation, and I had a little bit too much to drink to where I was unable to walk. I wasn't coherent at all. One of the other employees actually laid me down on a bed so that I could rest and get me out of the situation at the party. It was probably around two o'clock in the morning that I woke up to a pain in my stomach. And when I woke up, I seen one of my authoritative figures actually on top of me. And I don't know if it was due to fear or maybe the alcohol that I actually blacked out again at that point. I woke up and nobody was there. I pulled my pants up and went to the bathroom. When I stumbled out of the bathroom, I could tell something had happened to me. Something, it just didn't seem right. It seemed a little off. And that was when I realized that I had been that's when I realized I had been raped.

SPEAKER_01 4:50

Wow, I especially as a woman, I can't I can't imagine that moment when that realization hits you. And I think that it's important to say that it doesn't matter how much you drink or whether you are asleep on a bed or not, it is not okay for someone to come in and violate you like that.

SPEAKER_00 5:12

I totally agree, and that was some of the things that I struggled with in my healing process is the blame and the guilt that I put on myself. I blamed myself more than I blamed the perpetrator who did that to me. I put myself at fault in this situation versus realizing that it doesn't matter if you're drunk, it doesn't matter if you're completely naked in those situations. That doesn't give the right for anybody to take advantage of you at all. And I realize that a lot of women and a lot of men who undergo or have gone through rape or sexual assault or harassment, they have a tendency to blame themselves. And it also hinders their healing process because they might can forgive the person who did this to them or they might not even see fault in the person who did this to them. So they also have to learn to forgive themselves in that process.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

Yes, forgiveness is a powerful journey, and I can't wait to even get dig a little deeper with you into that. I want to ask the moment that you did become coherent and you saw the perpetrator, you remembered that person.

SPEAKER_00 6:21

Yes, ma'am. I actually know exactly who it was. And when I was laying back down on the bed, he was actually sitting on the bed next to me, rubbing my back. And he was like, Are you okay? Is everything okay? Because another employee had entered the room and asked why I was crying. Because they've never seen me hysterical like that, crying out like that. They've always seen me as somebody with joy and somebody who was always laughing or being a comedic relief in times of despair or depression. So when they seen me like that, they knew something was wrong, and it was almost as if he tried to play it off. It actually worked very well because during that time he actually walked me out and he specifically said, Don't say nothing because you're gonna get all of us in trouble. So I ended up that next day reporting it to my supervisor, and I was met with extreme retaliation.

SPEAKER_01 7:18

It's so hard for a survivor to come forward, and so it always hurts my heart when I see somebody that found the strength to do that, and they didn't get the support they needed. They maybe got doubt of oh, you don't know what you're talking about, or in your case, retaliation. Can you describe the retaliation? Like, was it um words that they said that were hurtful, disrespectful, inappropriate, and then what happened after that?

SPEAKER_00 7:46

Yes, it was actually words from former peers and employees that said you she deserved that or she brought that on herself. Um, I was also met with a write-up I've got written up for that incident as well. And then I was met with my papers to leave my career. They went ahead and fired me from my career because I wanted to press charges against that specific supervisor.

SPEAKER_01 8:16

What charges did they write you up?

SPEAKER_00 8:18

They relieved me of my duty for patterns of misconduct.

SPEAKER_01 8:22

So they're claiming that this has happened before.

SPEAKER_00 8:26

Right. They're saying that I'm basically a troublemaker and that my words can't be trusted.

SPEAKER_01 8:32

And did they say that before you were like, listen, I'm going to go after this perpetrator and press charges? Or did that come after?

SPEAKER_00 8:43

They advised me to go get a rape kit test done. So I went to the hospital that same day, maybe like eight hours after the rape had happened. I went to the hospital and I had a rape kit test done. I had the hair, the hair strands removed, blood work, all of that done. And I stayed there for a couple days, and the test came back conclusive that there was definitely a situation that occurred where it was not consensual. So they could see that there was not a consensual encounter due to the bruises, the scratches, and stuff on me.

SPEAKER_01 9:20

Right. Did you have a victim advocate?

SPEAKER_00 9:22

I did have a victim advocate. She was fantastic. I think the ball got dropped when it got into the manager's hands, the supervisor's hands. I think that's where the ball kind of got dropped, and that's when favoritism came into play.

SPEAKER_01 9:39

I think maybe you're being kind when you say the ball got dropped, because it sounds like what I am hearing is that they pretty much wanted to put it under the rug and just make you go away.

SPEAKER_00 9:51

Yes, they wanted to erase the situation and act like nothing ever even happened. They don't want to deal with the backlash.

SPEAKER_01 9:58

Right. There's a particular image that has to be upheld.

SPEAKER_00 10:02

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_01 10:03

Were you ready for it to just be pushed under the rug and move on?

SPEAKER_00 10:06

Oh no, I was ready to fight. I was not done. I pushed and pushed and pushed until I literally got relieved. Even after they kicked me out, I still pushed. I started working as a victim advocate. I started going to school for my AA degree. I started going to get my bachelor's degree for social work. So I continuously push because stuff like this cannot be swept under the rug. There are men and women out there who get sexually assaulted on a daily basis. I mean, with multiple people in an hour of a day, and it's like nothing is done, and nobody believes the victim. Nobody is there to support the victim. Nobody is there to help the victim. Now I did personally have a group of people that supported me and still support me till this day regarding that situation.

SPEAKER_01 11:05

That's so important to have that support and because there is somebody else that has been in that situation and understands, understands the details, the results of the rape kit, the fact that was not your fault, no matter what the circumstances were. So good for you to search, find that, and I'm so glad that even today that continues to Yes ma'am.

SPEAKER_00 11:25

Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_01 11:26

You're welcome. What symptoms of PTSD trauma you were left with after this incident?

Retaliation and PTSD

SPEAKER_00 11:35

Severe night terrors, night sweats, um, waking up in full panic attacks. I would fight in my sleep, like literally fight as though somebody was on top of me and would wake up and there's nothing there. I would sleep all day and stay up all night because the rape happened in the nighttime. So I felt like the moment that I fell asleep, I'm left in a vulnerable position. I could not be vulnerable at all around anybody. I put on this exterior as if I'm so hard and I'm so tough that nothing can touch me. And it actually pushed a lot of people out of my life because I didn't want to be vulnerable. I was afraid of being hurt again because that was somebody that I was friends with, that was somebody that I worked with, that was somebody that I cared about that did that. So it eventually led me to a belief that I can't trust anybody at all.

SPEAKER_01 12:36

Now, considering that person held that almost like family, you cared about them, uh position in your life. Did they ever come back and apologize? Uh acknowledge their behavior.

SPEAKER_00 12:48

They actually never did acknowledge their behavior, but they were still around people that I was around. So I kind of just forgave without saying I forgave and just smiled in the person's face as if nothing happened.

SPEAKER_01 13:01

Within this episode, we also want to pay honor to your brother.

SPEAKER_00 13:06

Yes, ma'am.

Brothers murder

SPEAKER_01 13:07

We talked about how he was murdered. Can you, whatever you're comfortable with, share some detail about that? Like, was it many years ago?

SPEAKER_00 13:18

It was on May 11th. It'll be exactly 11 years since my brother was murdered. Whew. The way that my mom walked into my house alone was just traumatic. Um, it was about three o'clock in the morning. So, once again, another situation where it's early in the morning. And my alarm went off on my house, and she walked in, and her exact words were, he's gone. They killed him, he's gone, and she is just in complete distraught and despair. I didn't know what she was talking about, and I was thinking maybe my father, because he was in and out of jail multiple times, so I didn't even think that it would be my brother. And the moment that she said, Jeremiah, your brother, your little brother, is dead, all the oxygen in my body left. I fell, like I fell to the ground.

SPEAKER_01 14:18

I can't imagine what that would feel like. Numbness, I guess, disbelief. And then when do you when do you get to the point to then start asking the questions of what happened? How did it happen?

No answers

SPEAKER_00 14:35

I jumped on that. If you can't tell, I'm a head first type person. Just you just dive right in. So once again, another situation where I did not take time to take care of myself, grieve, and deal with the trauma. I immediately dived right into my brother's case. I went, checked the crime scene. I was constantly in the police station when all witnesses were interviewed. I went to the state attorney's office, I got all the crime scene photos, the hospital photos, all the interviews, even um the both people involved in his murder. I got those interviews as well. And then I immediately started tearing apart the case. It became an obsession for me to solve my brother's case because I could feel that it was not being done properly. I felt that something was not adding up, and I'm like, this something's just not right. So a three-inch binder full of case files, I would go through daily and try to put together this puzzle piece. How did this happen? Why did this happen? How come these two people aren't locked up? Why didn't they get charged? And it ultimately deteriorated me.

SPEAKER_01 15:51

Did you get any answers you were looking for?

SPEAKER_00 15:55

I actually did not receive any answers. The person that originally turned himself in, he was in there for about a year and a half, and they ended up releasing him due to there not being a gun. Because there was no gun, the state laws, there's no proof. All they have is witness statements that is going that that's going back and forth. And it wasn't until let's say he was released probably a year and a half later. So in 2014, which was about two years after my brother's murder, he actually walked in to my church. Wow. The church that I was going to, he walked into, and I was like, sweet, sweet Jesus. I'll I don't know what it is that you want me to do, but I'm not comfortable right now. Like this is you don't expect that. You don't expect the person who murdered your brother to one go to church, but to two, walk into your church. Did he know it was your church? He didn't even know who I was. He had no idea what I looked like. He didn't know who I was. He just him and his mom came to church. They just came to church.

Forgiveness

SPEAKER_01 17:14

So what did you do?

SPEAKER_00 17:16

I acted out and walked out, and the pastor ended up stopping service, and he came out and the pastor came out and spoke to me. And he said, Darusini, he was like, You can either be a lion stuck in a cage full of rage and anger, or you can allow God to open that cage and you can be set free by forgiving him. And I prayed on it. I sincerely prayed on it, and we walked back into the church, and pastor said, We're just gonna stop service and we're gonna do an altar call. So pastor stopped service, mid-service, did an altar call. People walked up, and God was like, Go grab his hand and ask him if he wants you, if he wants to walk to the altar with you. My heart, this whole time, my heart is just beating hard, and I'm sobbing in tears. And I grab this man's hand and I say, Would you like to give your life to Jesus and walk to the altar? I have to take a breather real quick. I'm getting choked up a little.

SPEAKER_01 18:21

Please take your time. I'm overcome with emotion myself. This is amazing.

SPEAKER_00 18:30

I ended up walking him to the altar, and I held his hand the entire time, and I'm crying. And everybody goes and sit. There was probably about 30 people at the altar. Everybody goes and sits back down, and I walk him directly over to the pastor. And pastor's like, Would you like me to anoint you? He asked the man, and he proceeded with yes, please. And he looked me in my eyes, we're face to face, and he was like, Ma'am, why are you doing this? And I said, Because I'm Jeremiah's sister, and I seen his whole body just turn into fear. He didn't know it almost was like a fear of his life, but also a mixed amount of confusion and emotion and not understanding what's going on. And he proceeded to say, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to. This is what truly happened. And I said, I don't need to know what happened. God brought you and me here today for me to release this forgiveness to you so that we both can heal from this event. And Pastor anointed us, and I gave the man that murdered my brother a hug.

SPEAKER_01 19:47

Wow, dear Sina. That is so profound. I cannot wait to share your story, and truly that is forgiveness. Put aside your own emotions and sadness and loss and be able to give a hug to this person. Wow.

SPEAKER_00 20:14

The feeling was was unremarkable, but there was also the enemy was in my head saying that you just turned your back on your brother. You just turned your back on your brother, and God, all God kept saying was, Well done, my good and faithful servant. But the enemy's voice was so loud because he was so mad that I released that forgiveness, and for a long time it ate me up. I was like, Did I really do that? Did I really turn my back on my brother? And I began destructive patterns. I began using pain pills off the street to try to mute the enemy's voice, to not hear that and to not deal with the pain and to numb the pain. And it was just a flashback of both of those traumas. It's your fault. You you turned your back on your brother. It's your fault that you weren't there for him. It's your fault that you got raped. And it was just a cycle, a vicious cycle that just kept spiraling to the point where I wanted to end my life and go be with my brother. And God spoke to me and He said, Darusina, I need you to turn yourself into the hospital. So I called my mom and she drove me to the hospital. And I spent four months in an inpatient facility getting ongoing treatment and prolonged exposure for my brother's murder. And when I left that that treatment facility, I promised myself that I would never pick up his case file. Ever again. And here we are, four years later. I have not picked up that case file, and I'm also about to be four years sober off of all opiates.

SPEAKER_01 22:10

Congratulations.

SPEAKER_00 22:12

Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_01 22:14

Yes. I have a question. I want to pull this all together for you. So we have the the rape and you have your brother's murder. Which one occurred first?

Dealing with trauma

SPEAKER_00 22:28

The rape occurred first. That was in 2006.

SPEAKER_01 22:32

Okay. So you at that point are dealing with your own trauma, and then a matter of years later, now you're dealing with the death of your brother.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_01 22:42

What a strong woman. I appreciate your courage. I love that you lifted it up to God. And one of the words I've been using at church a lot is uh surrender.

SPEAKER_00 22:54

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_01 22:55

Uh-huh. And you surrender to God, and now where you are today is is a testament. We so let me ask you this as you are going through that journey of figuring out how to help others, what were you doing to help yourself?

SPEAKER_00 23:13

Realistically, I wasn't doing anything to help myself when I first started the journey to help others, and I think that's kind of where I slipped on my end because I kind of closed the bottle and was like, I'm okay, there's nothing wrong. I'm okay, I can do this. Now it's my turn to go help other people. I never actually dealt with the trauma and the identity struggles after that situation. It wasn't until I would say 15 years that I actually decided to get um exposure therapy done to help me with the situation that had happened that night.

SPEAKER_01 23:56

Can you explain that process? The exposure therapy?

SPEAKER_00 23:59

So there's multiple different types of exposure therapy, and the way that I can explain prolonged exposure is that's the one that I decided to take. You have to be a person who likes to dive in headfirst. So you just want to get it done. You don't want to beat around the bush, you don't want to pour some powdered sugar over it and sweeten it up. You want to go straight in for the details, the nitty-gritty, and do what you have to do to get healed. And prolonged exposure involves those nitty-gritty details. It involved me having to record the story in full detail in present time as if it were happening again. I had to record smells that I smelled, I had to speak about the things that I seen, how I the pain that I felt in my stomach. So it was almost as if you were completely reliving the situation, and I had to re-record it every single week, and every week I had to re-listen to it over and over again, and then I had to put myself in in positions that would raise my anxiety until my anxiety dropped, which they call those in vivo's. So places where I didn't feel safe, where there's a bunch of people like Walmart. I have to go stand in line with nothing in my hands and just sit there until my anxiety came down, knowing that there was somebody right behind me.

SPEAKER_01 25:25

Wow, that's interesting. I had not heard of that before, but I can definitely see where you say you have to just be like a bulldozer and just want to bulldoze through the whole situation, the trauma, and come out on the other side. Good for you. You have had positive results. And how long did that process take?

SPEAKER_00 25:44

That was probably about 16 weeks, and I will say I am extremely grateful that I did that because now I can go into public places alone. I can go on walks in park theme parks or boardwalks or nature trails alone and not feel like somebody's gonna going to attack me or somebody's gonna come and attack me from my backside. Am I still a little hyper-vigilant? Yeah, a little. Um, it's still something that I'm working on, but I can be inside big places and be alone, knowing that ultimately God is the one that's protecting me. There's nothing that I need to do.

SPEAKER_01 26:25

Oh, that's wonderful. I have found in my own situation that it was much easier to be the helper than it was to actually take a step back, look in the mirror, and figure out how to deal with my own trauma. So I completely get that almost diving in at first of how can I help people rather than thinking about how how to help myself. So that is probably rather normal, but I'm glad you got to the point where you recognized I need some I need some help.

SPEAKER_00 26:53

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_01 26:54

So you talked about you forgave. Shall we dig into the forgiveness part of your story? The and let go and let God.

Letting Go and Letting God

SPEAKER_00 27:04

Yes, we absolutely can. Um that day I did not forgive him when I was around that person, but once I went through exposure therapy and I realized the only way that I can truly begin my journey to overcome is to forgive. Because in 2 Corinthians 2 10, it says, When when I forgive, he forgives. God can forgive, and he does it in the authority of Christ for our benefit. Also, if I don't forgive him, I'm not forgiven for my sins, and there's no reason for me to sit and hold on to that anger because it was keeping me inbound in my house. I didn't want to go anywhere, I wanted to just stay somewhere where I felt safe.

SPEAKER_01 27:53

So, for you, when you finally got to that point of forgiveness, like the anger and in those adverse emotions kind of dissipated?

Overcoming fear

SPEAKER_00 28:01

Yes, they they actually did. I was able to start sleeping better, I was able to go out and be in public places, I was able to trust other people because I lost trust even for I hate to say it, but even for my own family. I was like, will they really protect me if something like this happens? Even though realistically I know they would, but that's just something that came with uh the trauma. So I was finally able to trust being in cars with them, um, going out in public, going to movie theaters by myself, being in a restaurant by myself, and not sitting with my back against the wall to view all exits. I was able to now sit with my back against the exit knowing that God's got my back.

SPEAKER_01 28:50

That is great. Because somebody who also I had issues with people speaking behind me because the robber was behind me when he said, Give me all your money. And so I startle very easily. Yep. Like if we go for a walk and somebody honks a horn or whatever, even if they're riding their bike and they're like on the left, I mean, I will jump. It is like the worst feeling. It's like you go through anger and then fear, and then you're like you reason yourself, like, okay, you're safe, it's okay. But I understand that that anxiety. I fortunately did not have it to the point where it was debilitating, like it had been for you, to where you couldn't leave your home. And fear is debilitating.

SPEAKER_00 29:33

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_01 29:34

Yes, and I think if there's a message you and I both know from living it is that the opposite of fear is faith. When you release that fear and turn towards faith, it really changed your life.

SPEAKER_00 29:49

It absolutely did. Fear can hold you back in a way that you never even think possible. But the moment that you release it and give it to God is the moment that you pick up that faith because faith makes us sure the things we hope for and gives us proof of the things that we don't see. And it's mentioned so many times, I think it's like 365 times in the Bible that it says fear not. And that's because God knew that we would fear something every single day, and He doesn't want us to fear, He doesn't want us to be dismayed because He is our God and He is with us wherever we go. He wants us to walk in faith, He wants us to walk in victory, He wants us to know that He has already won this challenge and this war.

SPEAKER_01 30:38

I want to ask you this question because my relationship in God in the past is I would start out by, Yes, God, it's me. I want something, I need something, and that's why I'm talking to you today. But as uh as a survivor of a violent crime, like violence has not left our world, right? It's it's not gone away. So, how are you maintaining consistently your strong faith?

SPEAKER_00 31:07

The way I look at it is God doesn't cause pain, but he also does not waste pain. So the enemy comes to kill, steal, and destroy, but God came to give life and life more abundantly. So when we keep our eyes focused on him and not the tactics of the enemy, then we won't be disabled by fear at all. And with all the the traumatic events that have happened in my life, I've had people ask me, How can you trust this world? It's not that I trust the world, it's I trust God who created this world. I trust Him and His protection over this world.

SPEAKER_01 31:54

I couldn't have said that any better. That's something that I think I need to write down and look at every day because it's so easy to forget. Do you do something on a daily basis to kind of keep God top of mind?

Daily practices

SPEAKER_00 32:07

I actually do. I wake up early in the morning to seek him and kind of hear his word, see what it is that Holy Spirit wants me to do throughout the day, if he has any assignments or anybody he needs me to pray over. I also attend church. We have clicks, not click as in C L I Q U E, but clicks as in like a seatbelt clicks. Uh so I attend that on Wednesday and Thursday. I also attend church on Sundays, and then I mentor students at our church as well.

SPEAKER_01 32:39

Awesome. I I love that, and I think that I need to start my day with uh that conversation with God as well. So thank you for sharing that and you inspire me.

SPEAKER_00 32:50

Oh, thank you. I'm I'm grateful that I can be of any kind of assistance.

SPEAKER_01 32:55

Absolutely, absolutely you are. Now, really wanted to talk about you know where you are today. I I love that you're four years sober, and what are you doing in your community?

SPEAKER_00 33:09

Right now, one of the biggest things that I'm doing that I never thought that I would see myself doing is mentoring kids. It is such a rewarding opportunity to be able to take the things that I have gone through in my life and utilize my journey to overcome to help light the pathway of healing for other people and to kind of guide these students to stay on solid ground so that they may not end up in situations like this.

SPEAKER_01 33:46

What do you find is the biggest struggle for our youth today?

The negative impact of social media on youth

SPEAKER_00 33:51

I would say the biggest struggle would be social media. I would say social media has tainted a lot of our youth's mindset on their identity, which is causing them to have thoughts of suicide or suicidal ideolation or actually acting it out.

SPEAKER_01 34:15

When social media years ago started to become popular, I said that that is gonna be the death of society. The influence that it has, the fact that we're all glued to our phones, the fact that you see a two-year-old in a stroller, you know, with a phone watching cartoons, it's like kind of crazy. I'm glad I didn't have social media when I was raising my boys. I mean, I remember my mom saying, Okay, don't let them in front of the TV watching Barney for too long.

SPEAKER_00 34:42

Yep. I'm glad we didn't have it either. We had dial up, and our mom told us either we're inside or we're outside. We played outside, we played Pine Cone Warren, hide hide and seek. These kids are now just they're they're addicted. It's become an addiction to our youth and it's hindering them.

Combating the negative impact of social media

SPEAKER_01 35:05

Absolutely, and it's an addiction for adults as well, which is why it's allowed for the kids because if the parent had to put the cell phone down, then that means they would have to, you know, entertain the kids. The the phone has become the babysitter, has become the entertainment. Let me ask you this, because this is really important for parents listening, for grandparents, for teachers, anybody that is in a position to influence our youth, what are you recommending they do to help combat this the social media, the poison that social media is putting into our youth?

SPEAKER_00 35:47

I would highly recommend that they spend as much time with their children or if you're a mentor with your youth as possible. And when I mean time, I don't mean time inside watching TV or time with any kind of technology. Take these children outside, show them the things of this world, show them what God put here on this earth because there's more to this life than technology. There's more to God has a purpose for every last single one of these children, and his plan for them is for them to prosper and succeed and to have a hope and a future. But we have to be the light that guides them to that hope and future. We can't allow them to sit stagnant.

SPEAKER_01 36:38

Right. When kids are bored, sometimes that's when bad decisions are made. There's so many things that influence that, but the one thing that we can control, I think, is what you just said, how we spend our time with our kids when we are with our kids.

SPEAKER_00 36:55

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_01 36:56

Is there anything else you want to add today so that I don't miss anything that's really important to you?

SPEAKER_00 37:03

Your healing journey does not begin until you learn to forgive not just the person who trespassed against you, but forgive yourself for the negative words that you were speaking over yourself and the negative thoughts that you have thought about yourself due to the traumatic experience that you have undergone.

The power of forgiveness

SPEAKER_01 37:23

Perfect. And you know what? Sometimes forgiveness is having to remind yourself of that every minute, every hour, every day, and then it becomes every week and then every month as you start to engrave it in your head and become stronger in your relationship with God.

SPEAKER_00 37:40

Yes, ma'am. It's not a definitely not a one-time thing. It takes a lot of time, and the more you do it, the more you realize, okay, I forgive them, I'm not upset. But in forgiveness, you also have to pray for that person. You have to pray a blessing over them, you have to pray that they draw nearer to God. That's what kind of helped me a little bit more excel in the forgiveness period because I wasn't just saying I forgive them, but I was saying, Lord, bless them, Father God. Break the generational curses off of them, Father God. Let their families prosper, let them be successful, Father God. And it might seem counterproductive because you feel that anger and that hatred, but you're also fighting the enemy when you do that.

SPEAKER_01 38:31

Absolutely. This has been an amazing conversation. I'm so glad we connected and were able to work it all out.

Fighting the enemy through forgiveness

SPEAKER_00 38:38

Thank you so much. I'm I was excited to be on here. I'm truly honored to be on your show.

SPEAKER_01 38:44

Absolutely. I am honored to have you on here as well. Dear Cena, thank you so much for being my special guest on the I Need Blue podcast.

SPEAKER_00 38:54

Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_01 38:56

You're so welcome, and you have a beautiful smile. We can see each other as we record, even though I don't record video, but you have a beautiful smile. So please keep sharing your smile with the world.

SPEAKER_00 39:07

Oh, thank you. I I hear that often, and I'm grateful that I can now share it with the world.

SPEAKER_01 39:14

I am too. I am too. All right. Thank you for listening today. This is Jen Lee with the I Need Blue Podcast. You can find all of my episodes on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, most podcast listening platforms, as well as my website, www.ineedblue.net. And remember, you are stronger than you think. Have a good day.